I came across this is an email today….gave me a good laugh and I thought I would share. I will post it under “Life’s Lessons!”

Whatever you give a woman, she’s going to multiply.

If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby.

If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home.

If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.

If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.’

So – if you give her crap,

you will receive more
shit than any one human being can handle.

Love and appreciate the woman in your life.

A very good friend of mine is releasing his 8th Solo C.D. If you don’t know Phil Perry, you have never heard Phil Perry!!!

Get more information at philperry.net (Hurry!)

So in wake of my recent move, I have been downsizing. Tossing this, donating that and selling a few larger things. I have found that craigslist is the hot ticket however, I have noticed some inquires to my ads have gone straight to my “SPAM” folder. I never pay much attention to the mail in there, not until today. That place is like hitting the jack-pot, winning the lotto…you should take a peak at what you have in there, could be well worth it!
I can;
1. Afford that dream house
2. Make $300.00 or more a day processing rebates
3. Get a full scholarship to be a nurse
4. Buy a home for $10,000 (i think i will get that dream house)
5. Find my one and only true love…for free
6. Be featured on Oprah
7. Be approved for any new vehicle
8. Flirt with sexy singles
9. Be an ebay millionire
10. Get a colored Dell computer for free
11. and a new pink iPone
and my favorites…
12. Have $1,500.00 in my checking account in one hour…just because
13. I can experience 4 beautiful nights in Cancun for free!
the possibilities are endless. You too can be just as ‘fortunate’, be sure to check your SPAM mail as well…you just never know!

Once upon a time a girl named Heidi had bugs…no wait, she made bugs. Not your typical pesky bugs but cute, lovable bugs. She made a lot, it was very therapeutic for her. She hand painted each and every one with her bare hands. Then life got crazy and Heidi had to put them in the ‘Bug Vault’ for awhile. Now as life settles down, the bugs are slowly creeping out, as cute and lovable as ever. Because there are so many and Heidi wants to make more, she will soon have to put them up for adoption. They are all named and for the most part well behaved. The Pot Pals live in potted plants, the Bug Mugs have magnets and are ideal for a refrigerators, etc…
The adoption fee is reasonable and a portion will go to an O.C.D. Foundation. Watch here for more details!!

So my son bought a new car a few months ago. Well, at 21 you CANNOT have a new car without G.P.S. It annoys the heck out of me. I call her Belle and she has absolutely no personality. How did we, ‘in the olden days’ ever find our way around? (barefoot in the snow)
You spend a small fortune for an emotionless voice to tell you where to go, not to mention by the time you enter all the information for Belle to process you could be half way to your destination. Part of me wants to “be hip” so I designed my own device. H.I.P. Heidi’s Ingenious Plan
It’s cheap.
It’s user friendly.
It’s portable, transfer it between your cars in seconds!

How does it work you ask?
You simply attach it (with velcro) to your dashboard facing towards you. It is at eye level, you will never lose your signal, etc…
So now you have made it to your destination but how do you find your way home?

You simply detach from the velcro, flip it upside down and WALA!
Now that’s H.I.P.

Well, it’s no secret I have a duck problem I having been missing them for sometime now.
Too long.
I was walking thru the park today enjoying the soft, green grass and picking those ‘blowy’ flower things. Enjoying nature…the birds, butterflies an occasional squirrel…
There in the distance, I saw something
No!
It couldn’t be!
Could it?
It was no longer yellow but ducks often change colors as they mature. Well, I was not going to take any chances. I bolted across that soft, green grass smashing every ‘blowy’ flower thing in my path. I startled the poor little as it started running when attempted to dive on it, embrace it and take it back to the row it so rightfully belongs. I didn’t give up though I gave that little guy a run for it’s money.

It wasn’t until I caught it (sorry little buddy!!) did I realize it was not one of my beloved ducks, it was a turkey! I recomposed myself, made sure nobody was injured and continued my journey thru the park.

But I was too sad to pick anymore ‘blowy’ flowers and every living creature I encountered ran for their lives when they saw me. That was my day….at the park.