When I woke up yesterday it was like Christmas morning with Santa in his UPS uniform at my door bearing gifts! The box clearly read Canon on it, my camera had arrived…all fixed, adjusted and sparkly clean. I guess the shutter mechanism thingy-bob had to be replaced. Whatever. I finally feel whole again!

Later in the day I had some errands to run and had a bit of time to kill before my nail appointment so I ran into The Dollar Tree to browse. I love going through their stationary stuff and almost always find a few treasures that I don’t really need. I picked up a little “Things I Need To Do” notepad, I’m real good about writing things down, just not so good at remembering where I wrote them. Right beside my little treasure was a bag of Boston Baked Beans. Obviously someone had willpower  not to indulge and put them back…in the stationary. A weakness of mine, I couldn’t help but wonder if they had been strategically placed there. I have no willpower and caved.

I walked around with my “To Do” pad and Beans hoping to find at least one more item to add to my treasures. Just when I had lost all hope, this body spray caught my eye…I simply could not resist. Great name, ya think? “Gee, what should I wear today? Hmm…Oh PHUKET!” “Heidi, what do you want for your birthday?” “Nothing” “C’mon, something!” “No, nothing” “Can you give me an idea?” “Just PHUKET” “Wow, sorry I asked!”

As I got in line to check out, I secretly giggled about my new found treasure. I am approached by a man (I will respectfully refer to him as Ben Dumped)
Ben: “HI”
Me: “Hi”
Ben: “I’m ugly, huh?”
Me: “Umm, no”
Ben: “I’m cute?”
Me: “Yeah…”
Ben: “My girlfriend just broke up with me”
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear…”
Ben: “She always calls me though”
Me: Maybe she misses…”
Ben: “Do you really think so?”
Me: “She might”
Ben: “I lost my job too”
Me: “That’s horri…”
Ben: “I got another one today”
Me: “Good for you, see…”
Ben: “Now I make $29 an hour”
Me: “That’s…”
Ben: “It’s $1 more than I used to make”
Me: “Things worked out in your favor, congrat…”
Ben: “I have a million dollar house here in Upland”
Me: “Wow…”
Ben: “It’s already paid off”
O.k., if somebody doesn’t get me away from this close-talker…soon, I’m going to freak out!! I’m pretty sure the lady in front of me is paying with all pennies as she has been counting her change this whole time.
Ben: “I have a house in Redlands too”
Me: “Yeah? Is it paid off…”
Ben: “It’s worth about $600,000 or even $650,000″
Me: “…”
Ben: “It’s paid off too. My ex lives in it.”
How many more pennies does this lady need? I’ll buy her stuff, just get me the heck out of here! I finally escape the house and have a productive day and all I want to do now is go home, get under my covers and eat my Boston Baked Beans.
Ben: “Are you married?”
Me: deep breath “Yep, 30 something years now” (in reality, this would have made me around 10 when I got married)
Ben: “I was married once”

Finally, it’s my turn. I try to keep my composure as I give the checkout dude the get me the hell outta here look. He strikes up a conversation with Ben, apparently they know each other. I am going nowhere fast. As I try to decide whether I should walk out or freak out, checkout dude rings me up. I try my keep my head from doing the 360 thing. “Will that be all?” he asks. I notice I am still holding my favorite treasure. As I set it down I reply, “No, PHUKET…I want this too.”

I sprint to my car, lock the doors and leave. If anybody wonders, cares, etc…I am home under the covers eating my Boston Baked Beans.

Home’s not so bad after all….

I am always so eager to blog, share and post pictures of my get-a-ways. Not so much this time, as fun as it was I am pouting big time. My camera, my extra appendage, my best friend, my Canon EOS 40D broke on day 2. Error 99, basically says you’re screwed. In the process of trying to rectify the situation, I emptied the memory card. Yeah, smart move. All is good now, camera is in the shop, I had already downloaded a few pictures to my computer and the rest I ‘borrowed’ off the internet (put your cursor over the picture to see what’s real vs. borrowed) so I would still be able to share my trip. That my friends is how nice I am!

Sadly, my O.C.D. has peaked, it has not been this bad in almost 2 years. I am devastated, sad, embarrassed and drained. Oddly, I also feel a deep sense of comfort.

In 1994 we adopted 6 week old Rex from the pound. He was playful, feisty, stubborn and ornery. He was never a lap cat and any affection was done on his time. After I was diagnosed with O.C.D. in 2001 Rex’s demeanor changed, he was now the most compassionate animal I had ever encountered. Sensing when it was going to be a challenging day for me, he remained by my side as long as needed, “protecting” me. If he was not next to me when I woke up, 3 pats to my chest with my hand would bring him to me….without fail. August 20th, 2007, after a brief illness we had to put Rex to sleep.  I miss him terribly, he had become so much more than a pet to me. His intuitiveness, loyalty and compassion simply amazed me. I am a firm believer animals are a great source of therapy and support, they’re love is unconditional.

A few months ago we took in an abandon cat, Oliver. He can only be described as a curious, mischievous, busy body who will “talk” to anyone willing to listen. Like Rex, he is not a lap cat and only occasionally will he even sit still long enough to let you pet him. He is like a 2 year old child and I often wonder what we got ourselves in to. His behavior lately has been odd. He will occasionally walk around aimlessly meowing but always stays within close proximity to me, he will then wrap his paws around my leg and bite it. He will do this over and over until he has my complete attention. I have woke up the last 5 mornings to this little busy body snuggled up to me, his head laid on my chest and his big green eyes watching over me.
When I finally realized what was causing his “odd” behavior, it gave me the chills. Oliver had taken on the role of “protecting” me.  Each and every time he bit me, I had been stuck in a O.C.D. cycle. My most challenging days have been those that I awoke to find him by my side.

Again, I am amazed at their loyalty, compassion and the ability to sense when something is wrong. As hard as this is…and as silly as this may sound, it gives me comfort. He is my little Guardian Angel.

I somehow fell asleep last night before hitting “publish,” just noticed…

I’m home from my much needed getaway. Although I enjoyed myself immensely, it may take a few days to recoup. The week was great but busy. And for anyone that cares, this was just a practice run. Though nobody’s fault, a few unforeseen circumstances didn’t allow us the usual “girly, bonding” time. Note, I’m already marking my calendar for the next trip. I had been semi-planning this trip for the past few weeks, after last Wednesday, I knew it was time to go. I had my deposition in the morning, (for a car accident I was in last year) Not that I’ve done a gazillion, but this was the first time I was mic’d up with a big camera in my face. It was so all-about-me, I almost had a Kate Gosselin moment. It went smooth, the usual do you swear..yeah, yeah. I charge $20.00 for each autograph er signature and leave. I make my way back to my car to find, not 1 but 2 parking tickets secured neatly on my windshield. Would I have bought the $1.50 parking permit? I would if I had seen the sign. $39.50. Would I have had a front license plate on my car? I would if it wasn’t mangled from the accident and the body shop that fixed my car would have made a place for it on the front of my car. $44.50.

I get home and head out back to water my plants and reflect on my fame morning. It happened once…then again and 1 more time. Three different hummingbirds pooped on me 3 different times. Small bird, small poop, gross just the same.

I change my clothes just as the cable/internet dude shows up to upgrade my cable. (I did not have Animal Planet) (I really like Animal Planet) He does his thing, I thank him, he leaves. A few minutes later, I realize that although I have Animal Planet, my internet no longer works. Whoa. In a moment of complete insanity, I do what anyone else would do. I chase him down the street, barefoot, wailing my arms, screaming, “Stop, you broke my internet!” All the while my backside is jiggling like jello on a roller coaster. It payed off, he had me back on the WWW in no time. Poor guy, he did get a good laugh…at my expense. As I walk him out, I run into a neighbor. We chit-chat for a bit as we watch her dog play. As I head back into the house, a quick glance in the right direction reveals my pants are unzipped.

A few hours later my boyfriend and I decide to switch our cars around. Not knowing exactly where he is parked, I climb in my car and follow him….and follow him…and follow him. Now I’m just plain irritated. I yell out the window, “Where the hell are you going and why are you walking so slow?” With that, he turns around with the most puzzling look. I have no idea who this guy was, but it wasn’t my boyfriend. (it’s not like it was broad daylight or anything)

Right about now, I’m thinking I really do need this getaway. Like tomorrow. Focus Heidi, prioritize.
1. Pick-up necessities for trip
2. Do laundry
3. Pack
I run to the store for my necessities, Vodka, (for my traditional Vodka party on the beach at sunset.) (The party usually consists of me) Wine (for my new traditional Wine party on the beach at sunset) and Tequila. (for my…….) Now, by the time I get home, the laundry room is closed. I have 8 million loads of laundry staring me in the face. Focus Heidi, prioritize. I manage to narrow it down to 5 loads (7 million 7 hundred and 95 thousand less…I think) Seriously, what would be the harm in doing laundry after hours? Exactly! With the lights off…hee…hee…I sneak my 5 loads in, fill up the washers, look both ways and leave. Thirty-five minutes later I re-enter and transfer the clothes to the dryer. Using my cell phone as a flashlight, I ‘squat’ down in front of each dryer, making sure I had removed the hang to dry clothes. Oh, about the 3rd dryer I hear keys clanking, I turn around just as Security opens the door.
“Need help?”
“Nope, just doing some laundry.”
“I see that. The laundry room is closed, has been.”
“Yeah, I know…it’s only 5 loads…I have to leave town…I had an emergency…I had to go buy Vodka for…am I…are you going to arrest me?”
In the deepest, most sincere, security guy voice, he asks how much longer I’ll be.
“I’ll hurry”
He gives me a quick nod. As he walks out the door, he flips on the light.
“This might help!”
My kids would be so ashamed.
If it’s any comfort boys, my pants were zipped up!

The next morning, I packed up my car and made my 98 mile journey to Ventua Beach. A week later, I’m home. Perhaps a little more frazzled than before I left.
I spent a night (oink) deathly ill, all (oink) night long, I wondered if it was the Swine Flu. I got ANOTHER parking ticket, my camera broke and I lost about 100 lbs. We’ll save that for next time, I’m exhausted. Good night for now….

(pssst…you’re pants are unzipped)

Made you look

Don’t worry… I have been out of town on important business vacation and the internet connection is horrible. I will be back in a few days with the low-down and a few pictures. Why only a few you ask? My right arm, my companion, my camera, is broken!!!!!

Just reading this makes my tummy roar!
One of my all time favs….and if I can make it, you can too!! Always a hit, I’ve even hooked a guy or two with this recipe! Not too sure about something…have a question…need an opinion? Just email me, I will be more than happy to do a tasting for you. (just doing what I can to make the world a happier place!) A great reheat and eat meal too!
(put your bi-focals away, you can click on image for a larger view)

I’m speechless, I have been named Mother Of The Year!!!

Thanks to everyone who voted for me!!!

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Enjoy…
Happy Mother’s Day!!